Thursday, July 9, 2009

Forget the Bars. I Found the Sweet Spot.

I discovered a new way to pick up guys.

See, my home is old. Thus, I have no dishwasher. Thus, I bought a portable one. Thus, I couldn't EVER get it to hook up to my sink. Well, my dad visited, busted my faucet trying to make it work, and my realty center replaced it. And bam, I had the exact faucet head I needed.

Just missing one little part.

So, I had come home from work, discovered my new faucet, stuck on my cute little purple nike shorts and bee-bopped around the house for a while. The decided to run some errands and try and get my little part to put my personal dish washing days behind me. So, I dropped by Home Depot with my little part in hand, glasses on and hair mussed. And still wearing sequin necked shirt and chandelier earrings left over from work. Not a bad outfit.

So, I walk around clueless in the enormous shopping mall for men and some how find my way to plumbing and start playing around with nipples and joints and washers. I knew my efforts were rather fruitless, but I was just killing time until I stumbled upon a helpful hand. Well, Jose was looking at parts next to me (he enjoys working in his garden after work) and looked at me and said "Wrong size." Then he plucked my piece right out of my hand and started looking for the correct solution to my dishwasher woes. Soon, we were out of options and he only had questions about where I lived and worked. I had to move on.

So, I found an orange aproned man on the next aisle and replied to the negative when he asked me if I was finding everything I needed and shortly had him on his hands and knees finding my correct adapter. I told him what I was doing and he asked, "Are you doing this by yourself?"

"Yes." I replied to the ringless 30 something handyman. Little did I know, that little word must have sparked a fire within his soul.

Seated on the floor beside him, he finally handed me my adapter of choice declaring, "This is what you need."

"Ok," I replied, "Do you promise?" I've had no dishwasher for 6 months. I needed confirmation.

"Yes. But, I'll tell you what, if it doesn't work, you bring it back here, and I'll buy you dinner."


But I laughed and said, "Oh, so then I won't have to do the dishes?"

He continued, "If it does work, you can buy me dinner. See, it works out good for you either way."

I continued to laugh it off but he threw out his offer a couple more times and I realized he was being serious. I thanked him for his help and asked him his name (so he wouldn't feel completely rejected of course since I was not about to agree to dinner in the faucet aisle), told him mine and headed out the store.

"I work afternoons and evenings. Just come by and see me." He called after my purple shorts.

I smiled the whole way too my car. Thank goodness for self-checkout so I didn't have to look like an idiot in front of the cashier.

So hey, I think I got asked out on a date for tomorrow night. Within like 5 minutes of meeting guy. I am so hitting up the Hardware Stores more often!!!

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